Notes from Vacation

1. There are restful vacations, and there are busy vacations. Our recent trip to Chicago was definitely a busy vacation. Some days were just a blur of escalators, subway trains, stairs, and revolving doors.

2. Studio apartments make me appreciate how roomy our little house really is. That being said, our apartment was quite nice, and much cheaper than a hotel.

3. We watched Fourth of July fireworks from the rooftop deck of our twelve-floor apartment building. We tried to watch the Navy Pier fireworks, but our view was mostly obstructed by taller buildings. We could see fireworks from another direction somewhere off in the distance, though, and that suited us just fine, especially since the kids are a little afraid of fireworks.

4. I thoroughly enjoyed the baseball game at Wrigley Field. I'm not a baseball fan, but watching a game there was a neat experience. So was trying to stay together after the game as we worked our way out of the ballpark and toward the subway. We eventually took a cab.

5. Even though the Chicago subway isn't as clean and nice as the D.C. subway, it was my favorite form of city transportation. The bus was my least favorite. I think I'm intimidated by the drivers, who seldom have patience for tourists who aren't sure how much the fare is, or how to put the fare in the little thingy. Plus I'm always afraid I'll miss my stop and get lost.

6. The hardest part of the trip physically was getting from Midway airport where we parked our car for the week to the apartment where we stayed. With two large pieces of luggage and two small children, we took the orange line, then transferred to the red line, and then walked two blocks to the apartment. We had to carry our bags up and down stairs while holding on tight to our children. The trip back was about the same. However, the hubby said his suitcase somehow gained weight during the trip.

7. The kids are incorporating Chicago experiences into their play at home now. Seth has been playing subway on his bike. He rides round and round in the driveway saying things like, "Next stop is Clark and Division." He even makes up his own subway stops: "Next stop is Hal Greer and Elephant." Then he rings his bike bell and says, "Doors opening," and then, "Doors closing." After noticing that every cab had a license number posted inside, he wants a sign with his "tractor number" for his battery operated John Deere. The kids have been pretending to speak other languages as well, and they are arranging their toys to be the Chicago skyline in the family room.

8. Two small children and the Art Institute -- not one of our better ideas. Honestly, they did pretty well for small kids in a museum whose map frustrated even us grown-ups. We must have walked past the same exhibits ten times looking for American Gothic. They added a new wing a while back, and the layout of the place is totally confusing now. The workers there did a lousy job of giving directions, too. We would ask three different people for directions to the same place, and each would give us a completely different answer . . . none of which seemed to be the correct answer. So when the kids got whiny, I couldn't blame them; I felt like whining, too. The first half hour or so, they were pretty into the art, really. Seth likes Monet, and Lydia likes anything pink or anything with a cat.

9. It rained during the day on the Fourth. That was our Art Institute day. After the Institute, I promised the kids something fun because they had been so patient, and then nothing turned out to be very fun because of the rain. So we shopped, and I was going to buy each kid a small book or toy, but we couldn't find anything we liked/could afford. And then Aunt H. mentioned the Hello Kitty store and the Lego store at another mall. We were all over that. To the subway we went! When we found the Hello Kitty store, I told Lydia she could pick out one small thing. I figured it would take her forever to choose something, but she walked in, asked, "Where are the stuffed animals?" and proceeded to pick out the stuffed Hello Kitty with the pinkest clothes. In and out in five minutes. Seth took longer in the Lego store, mostly because he's not as into Lego as he wants to be, and ended up with two very small Lego keychains. Lydia insisted on carrying her own bag and clung to that Hello Kitty bag through dinner (even while she napped), on the subway, and on the walk back to the apartment.

10. I don't like Ferris Wheels. I'll ride almost any roller coaster, but Ferris Wheels scare me. Nonetheless, we rode the Navy Pier Ferris Wheel, which is wayyyy tall. And then we went to the top of the Hancock building (third -- or fourth? -- tallest building in Chicago -- we were told the view was better from there than from the Sears Tower). We rode the Ferris Wheel again a few days later, and it didn't scare me so much that time after having been up 94 floors.

11. Lydia had a Marilyn Monroe subway grate moment one day. We were going down the steps to the subway when the wind picked her dress up. Her eyes got wide, and then she grinned and said, "I feel embarrassed!"

12. We miss my sister-in-law now. Seth is pretty sure he wants to marry his Aunt H. when he grows up.

13. Not typically much of a TV-watching family, we did turn the TV on to get some news every evening as we were getting the kids ready for bed. Because my kids aren't accustomed to TV as background noise, when it's on, they're fully tuned in. So I've answered far more questions about Michael Jackson, his death, his drug use, and his children than I ever intended to.

14. Every time we go to a zoo or aquarium and see any sort of ocean life, my husband insists on having seafood for dinner.

Little Donuts' Dictionary, June 2009 Edition

assball [as bawl] see also assbulb - noun - A brownish-black solid or semisolid mixture of bitumens obtained from native deposits or as a petroleum byproduct, used in paving, roofing, and waterproofing: Is that black stuff on the parking lot assball?


handcuffs [hand kuhfs] - noun - a device to hold a cup or other drinking vessel: Can we take our drinks in the car and put them in the handcuffs?

nog [nog] - verb - to make a slight, quick downward bending forward of the head, as in assent, greeting, or command: If the answer is yes, nog your head.


potroastes [pot rohst uhz] - noun, pl. -Any of numerous oval, flat-bodied insects of the family Blattidae, including several species that are common household pests: What do potroastes look like?

power lines [pou-er laynz] –noun - a series of chairs suspended from an endless cable driven by motors, for conveying skiers up the side of a slope, and often found at amusement parks: I can't wait to ride the power lines!

tardon [tahr dn] - verb - to make courteous allowance for or to excuse: Tardon me, do you know what time it is?

university [yoo-nuh-vur-si-tee] see also anniversity - noun - the yearly recurrence of the date of a past event: Happy fortieth university, Grandma and Grandpa!

words [wurdz] - noun, pl. - something awarded, as payments or medals: We're having a words assembly tomorrow at school.

Little Donuts' Dictionary, April 2009 Edition

anacondom [an-uh-kon-duhm] – noun. a very long, heavy, South American boa that crushes its victims in its coils: At preschool today, we learned about a huge, giant snake called an anacondom.

lollipopper [lol-ee-pop-er] – noun. a person employed in a pediatrician’s office to make appointments, collect payments, etc.: After the doctor checks us, can we go see the lollipopper?

Morocco Bama –[muh-rok-oh bah-muh] -- proper noun. the 44th president of the United States of America: Can I draw a picture for Morocco Bama?

pinecones [pahyn-kohn] – noun. cone-shaped markers, generally made out of plastic or rubber, that are placed on roads or footpaths to temporarily redirect traffic. Why are there pinecones on the road?

potholder [pot-hohl-der]– noun. a hole formed in pavement, as by excessive use or by extremes of weather. Can I watch them fix the potholder in our road?

remount [ree-mount] – noun. the sum of two or more quantities; the total: I know how to do my homework. I'm supposed to add the numbers and write the remount here.

safety control [seyf-tee kuhn-trohl] -- noun. in an elementary school, uniformed student hall or bus monitors: Some of the fifth graders are safety control on the bus, and they scare me.

scrivvle [skriv-uhl]– verb. to write carelessly or illegibly: If we scrivvle on our papers, Mrs. S. gives us a frowny face.

wholegrain [hohl-greyn] – noun. a type of intense, periodically returning headache, often accompanied by nausea, visual disorders, etc.: Lydia kicked me off the bed and gave me a good wholegrain headache.

Little Donuts' Wisdom, Treyf Edition

Donutbuzz: How about bacon and eggs for dinner?

Jelly-filled and Lydia: Okay.

Seth: I think I forgot to tell you. I'm kosher now.

Jelly-filled: You are?

Seth: Yeah, I don't eat bacon anymore.

Jelly-filled: Since when do you keep kosher?

Seth: Well, I saw a pig on Sesame Street, and it was really gross, and I don't want to eat pigs anymore, so I'm kosher now.

Donutbuzz: [proceeding to make dinner] Lydia, set the table please. [This is Lydia's favorite job because she likes to use the ice cream spoons Aunt H. gave us -- the ones with cute little animal-shaped handles.] Oh, you'll change your mind, Seth.

Seth: No, I won't. The pig on Sesame Street was gross and yucky, so I'm kosher. [For the record, it WAS a particularly disgusting pig.]

Jelly-filled: That's fine, honey. You don't have to eat bacon. Would you like something else?

Seth: I just want yogurt. (walks to the fridge and gets his yogurt)

(The kids sit down to eat.)

Lydia: Did you try your yogurt?

Seth: Not yet.

Lydia: Take a bite.

(Seth obeys.)

Lydia: (with a sly smile) I gave you the pig spoon.

Little Donuts' Dictionary, January 2009 Edition

blacktop [blak-top]-- noun. a portable, battery-powered microcomputer small enough to rest on the user's lap: I love typing on Daddy's blacktop!


hick [hik] -- noun. an indirect, covert, or helpful suggestion; clue: I don't know the answer. Can you give me a hick?

hurtable [hurt-uh-buhl] –adjective. causing hurt or injury; injurious; harmful: I'm the good Darth Vader, and the good Darth Vader doesn't do hurtable things.

quit it out [kwit it out] -- idiom. Informal. to stop doing something: Ouch! Quit it out, Seth!

temichal [tem-i-kuhl -- noun. a substance produced by or used in a chemical process: My magic bath water has special temichals in it that make it change color.

unicord -- [yoo-ni-kord] -- noun. a cord connecting the embryo or fetus with the placenta of the mother and transporting nourishment from the mother and wastes from the fetus: I know what my belly button is for. It's where my unicord was!

Goats

What a strange day full of totally unrelated bizarre incidents. I want to talk about it, but I can't.

I will say that I learned what a wether is. Through no fault of my own.

And I am discouraged. I don't mean about goats and their testicles or lack thereof. I'll leave all that for the goats to worry about. I'm discouraged because today I stumbled upon more than neutered, and partially neutered (again, through no fault of my own), goats -- and by "stumbled upon," I do not, thank goodness, mean literally.

I found racism where I wasn't expecting it. I found narrow-mindedness and insensitivity where I was not expecting them. That's what I'd like to write about, but I really can't.

So I'll just say again that I learned what a wether is, and I wasn't expecting to learn that. You never know what you'll find, or where you'll find it.

Little Donuts on Love and Marriage

There is no convincing my children that they will not marry one another when they grow up. They tune me out when I mention laws against such things. I know I am not the first parent whose young children have betrothed themselves to one another, and I admit to being greatly comforted when my friends tell me that their children outgrew this stage eventually. For now, though, there is at least occasional talk that a union will take place. And if it does, I think we all know who's going to wear the pants in the family.

Tonight at dinner:

Seth: "If I have kids, you know what I'll name them? If it's a boy, it will be Sam If it's a girl, it will be Brooke."

Lydia: "If I have kids, you know what I'll name them? Well, forget about boys. I'll have a girl, and I'll name her Cappy."

Seth: "I don't think that's a very good name. Your husband might not let you name her that."

Lydia: "Oh, you'll let me, Seth. You'll let me."